"For us let it be enough to know ourselves to be in the place where God wants us, and carry on our work, even though it be no more than the work of an ant, infinitesimally small, and with unforeseeable results."
-- Abbé Monchanin

Sunday, December 07, 2008

"Stop the Turkey!"


(Before)

Around Thanksgiving I was walking down the street minding my own business when I heard a noise behind me. People around me were looking behind me with strange expressions on their faces. I turned to see what was going on. I saw a man rapidly approaching, running in fact, with a huge ax yelling what sounded like, "Stop the turkey! Stop the turkey!" As the man got nearer, it became obvious that he was actually yelling, "Chop the turkey!" not "Stop the turkey!"

When the man got alongside me he began to swing his huge ax wildly at ME, all the while yelling, "Chop the turkey!" I began to bob and weave, duck and dive, to avoid the razor sharp double blade ax as the lunatic tried to chop ME.

By the time bystanders got the police and they were able to taser the man into submission, I looked like this!

(After)


(Actually, none of this really happened. I just made up this story as a response that that inevitable question, "Did you get a haircut?" that people always ask one who has just gotten a haircut. Of course, since I had such a stupid answer for such a stupid question, no one asked. Not wanting to waste the story, I'm saving it here.)